Some New Thoughts
by Ziska Ames
Summary: A series of short stories which show how the scouts might have viewed the break-up.
1. Mars' Memory

Author's Notes: I read a suggestion from someone. They meantioned how   
almost all break-up season stories deal with Serena and Darien's   
reunion. I started thinking about that and realized how true it was.  
I also wondered why you never learned much about the other scouts. This  
is the first in a new series of shorts. All will be connected only   
through the topic of the break up and each is from a different scouts'  
point of view. I think this might have been how they saw things.  
  
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Mars' Memory  
Recorded by: Ziska Ames  
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It hurt watching them fight. I know I liked Darien, but seeing   
him in so much pain was not something I enjoyed. I'll admit, I was   
jealous. Serena didn't deserve him, I thought. But I was wrong. She   
deserves him just as much as he deserves her.   
  
She had been so strong. She smiled and tried to act normal.   
She failed miserably of course, but at least she tried. More than I   
could do. I just wanted to kill Darien at times. How can one man   
embody stupidity so well? How could he hurt her like that?  
  
The dream. Yes, he told us about the dream. I feel bad for him   
too. The poor guy just doesn't understand how strong love really is.   
Especially the true love between him and Serena. At least she figured   
it out as well. Now their back together and everything's great.  
  
But I can't forget their pain. They tore each other's souls   
out and some body has to remember. The future holds many terrors and   
years of trial. They'll fight, and I'll be here to remind them of   
their love. They need me and that's why I protect my princess. She's   
strong, but she needs me, just like she needs the other scouts. We   
have to love and protect her.  
  
When Darien broke up with her, she cried every night. I know   
because she called me to talk. She'd tell me everything about him. All   
the things he used to do that she missed. All the ways he had ignored   
her that day. The conversations always ended with tears. She just   
couldn't help it. And I couldn't blame her. But after every one of   
those conversations I felt even more as if Darien deserved to be hung.   
  
But then I would talk to him, and know the difference. I knew   
about the dream from the beginning. Darien called me after he broke up   
with Serena and I had a talk with him too. He told me all about the   
dream. And damn it all, he swore me to secrecy. Otherwise, Serena   
would have known from day one what was going on.   
  
When we went to the future and met King Endymion, I had a chat   
with him as well. I understand now why he tested Serena and Darien,   
but sometimes I wonder why I didn't stop it. Why didn't my future self   
remind Endymion of the pain he and Serenity endured? After our trip to   
the future, I figured out the answer. Endymion and Serenity are closer   
than any two people could ever be. And it's because at one point they   
lost each other.   
  
While Serena cried herself to sleep, I listened to Darien's   
side. And then I would pray. The Fire never told me much, but it told   
me not to interfere. I think standing still during the whole episode   
was the hardest thing I ever did.  
  
I love Serena and I love Darien. But I love them as my leaders   
and I wish them the best together. I just hope they can manage to stay   
together. With my help, they probably will. 


	2. Jupiter's Justification

Author's Notes: There is no need to have read "Mars' Memory"   
before this. All these shorts can stand alone. However, it might help   
a bit in understanding some things so it is recommended to read "MM"   
if you haven't already. ^-^  
  
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"Jupiter's Justification"  
Recorded by: Ziska Ames  
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I don't know why I didn't kill him. I wanted to, believe me I   
did. I've always been the violent one in the group and during their   
break-up I would have throw Darien off a cliff at Serena's slightest   
word. Of course, I'd have beaten him senseless first. Unfortunately   
for me, Serena was too kind hearted to allow such a brutal fate for   
her true love.  
  
In that aspect Darien is the luckiest man alive. Even though   
he tossed her aside, Serena stayed completely loyal to him. The   
strange part was when Raye would stop me from hurting him. I know she   
liked Darien, but I thought she was over that. It wasn't till later   
that I learned the whole truth. Raye had known about everything from   
the beginning. She stopped my threats to Darien because she knew how   
much pain he was in. I don't think I could have restrained myself. In   
her situation, I'd have probably forced Darien to tell Serena about   
the dream from the get-go. That's another way that Darien was lucky.   
  
When we went to the future and learned that the whole break-up   
was because of King Endymion, I was ready to pound him too. How could   
he do that to himself? I wanted to just break something when I saw the   
pain they were enduring. All four of them, past and present. The worst   
part was seeing Neo-Queen Serenity trapped in that ice-coffin. It hurt   
to see my queen that way. But then I would look at Serena and see how   
things really were. I'd lay down my life for her.  
  
I wondered at times when we got back, if Endymion wasn't just   
proving the phrase, "Misery loves company." He couldn't be with Serena   
in his time, so why should his past self get to be with Serena in that   
time? I would think about that, then discard the idea. Why would he   
want to destroy the time he did have with her, even if it was in the   
past? It just didn't add up. But still, I wonder.  
  
I look at them now. Serenity seems like a newborn. She takes   
utter delight in every aspect of life, even more so than she used to.   
She's so very happy to be out of that coffin. And I don't blame her. I   
was also trapped in confinement with the other scouts as we protected   
her and Endymion.  
  
I look at him doting on her and loving her. I can't condemn   
him. He's lost her too many times not to realize how precious she is.   
My heart twists for a moment in envy. I wish I had a love like that.   
But I can't. We were made to last forever, Serena's just the lucky one.   
She gets a mate who can be with her. I turn my head away and bow it.   
My envy flows gently from my heart, as it always does when I watch my   
Queen and King.  
  
I can't envy them their love. It's too perfect. 


	3. Mercury's Mourning

ANs: Once again, any of these stories can stand alone, but it  
might help to read them all.  
  
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"Mercury's Mourning"  
Recorded by Ziska Ames  
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It may appear to the casual observer as if I depend quite a bit   
upon my super computer. And it is true. I use my computer for almost   
everything because it is a rather simple and compact database. But it   
can't help me with everything.  
  
I'll admit, the first thing I did when Serena and Darien broke   
up was enter statistics into my computer. I wanted to know what was the   
most probable cause, how long this would last, if Darien was lying.  
  
My computer wasn't very much help. No matter what different   
combinations I tried, the computer always gave me the same answer.   
Undefined. It couldn't do this for me. It couldn't give me a percentage   
or a probability.   
  
I had to use my brain for something that was almost completely   
foreign to me. Unraveling someone's emotions. I hide behind my books.   
When my father left, my mother wrapped herself into her own world. And   
so did I. I couldn't help her and she couldn't help me. We were both   
left to face a major change in our lives without each other.   
  
She moved on, becoming a doctor and making a new life for   
herself. But I'm still hiding behind my books. And I had hopes to   
continue hiding all the way through college and into my adult life. But   
Serena's pain pulled me out of that world and into a new and abrupt   
one. I saw her crying and tried to help. Unfortunately, I didn't know   
how. I was inexperienced with emotions of any kind. So I tried to   
retreat back into my own world and let everyone else discover what was   
going on.  
  
During that time, I spent some hours having conversations with   
Lita. It was her who really pulled me out of my shell. She helped me   
get over my father. She helped me see that it wasn't my fault. I guess   
losing her parents made her more receptive to other people's hurts. No   
matter how she did it, I was no able to sympathize. I could see how   
Serena was hurting.  
  
I loved my father and when he left it almost killed me inside.   
Darien had done the same to Serena. We all know now that it was because   
of a dream. After that was discovered I used to wonder if perhaps my   
father would come back. He never did and I've gotten over that fact   
now.   
  
I'm happy for Serena. She got her love back. She and Darien are   
strong together and have more faith in each other than I have seen in   
any other couple. When my mother died, she told me she was glad my   
father left.  
  
She had been given a chance to grow and become herself. I told   
her that I was glad she had that chance and that she had taken it,   
embraced it with all her heart.  
  
I'm glad now for myself. I've become all I can hope to be and   
I've discovered even more how important friendship is. Serenity comes   
to me to talk quite a bit now. I'm perhaps her closest confidant. Every   
once in a while, I give Jupiter a hug and thank her.  
  
She just smiles and we both continue to look after our King and   
Queen. 


End file.
